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Or, The Paywall

Reader,

I want so badly to read things behind paywalls. Sometimes I wish I could pay per view - or be part of a community that hops over it together at $1 US or less  a head. But then I think about how, over the last few years, I’ve ruminated on what it means to pay artists, journalists and so on and what one takes away from creators with every Subscription ya Jamii where the jamii in question is a group of 10 friends ages 25-35. Of course we could turn this into a meditation on what family means, and who we get to consider family in the face of society’s description; but we won’t.

Recently, Bria on BookTube had a short vlog where she shared some research she was working on and talked about how it made her want to go to graduate school and when I tell you I felt that? I obviously have romantic notions that haven’t been shaken by seeing some of my nearest and dearest experience character development in the ivory tower and even the barriers to entry don’t factor into my fantasy. In reality, the part of me that’s too anxious to do everyday things really rears its head when I think of applications so imagine years of academia.

Wow, this got bleak (two weeks in a row; are you ok bestie?)

Something that’s making me glad lately: magazines. Yes, those. I’ve been slowly working through the June/July 2022 issue of Allure Magazine and let me tell you minor it’s such a delight to go back to one of the joys of my teenage years. Including the surreal experience of the e-copy not being edited for digital audiences leading to an ad like this:

Setting aside my perpetual need to read read read books and recognising that what I seek is the pleasure of words has been key in granting me re-entry into this world. I struggle with pleasure (being asked to name 3 things that make me happy over the weekend was, shall we say, illuminating?) and so having access to something as simple as magazines (especially one like Allure that’s about beauty) means I can raise that count to 4. While we’re here, look at the cover:

Away from this magazine, I’ve finished 3 books since I last wrote to you: the good but forgettable Stray Dogs: And Other Stories by Rawi Hage (short stories don’t seem to hit when they’re audiobooks lately), the harrowing but ultimately hopeful The Bread the Devil Knead by Lisa Allen-Agostini (this had me reacting audibly as I got my hair cut) and the wonderfully poetic Memorial Drive: A Daughter's Memoir by Natasha Trethewey (poets do it different, phew!). Reading the last two back to back was…a decision on my part because (this is no spoiler), the domestic violence that ultimately ended Trethewey’s mother’s life is the very thing at the heart of Allen-Agostini’s book. I’ve also been listening to podcasts (whose barriers to entry, and paywalls at times, I am keenly aware of as a podcaster myself) —  Allure led me to the binge-worthy Dynasty by Vanity Fair and Don to Maintenance Phase (you may recognise Aubrey Gordon from yrfatfriend); both of which have been great company between audiobooks.

Per usual, I came into this thinking I’d have nothing to say but here we are haha. I have so many books to talk about I might just do a couple of ‘1 minute or less a book’ videos à la Jack Edwards to catch up over on YouTube. Wish me luck!

As ever, please write back to me and tell me what books you’re reading or looking forward to reading this week — it’s always a great time talking about books.

Enjoy the rest of the week and have a lovely time reading. Talk to you soon!